Toilet Humor


Aurora hasn't got a pot to piss in, at least according to one resident.

Read his email directed to the Mayor in hopes of rectifying what can only be understood as a huge blunder.

Ms Mayor,

Thank you for you response below and thanks also to Councillors Wilson and Buck as well as Mr. Giroux for their invaluable input.

I understand that the neighbouring towns have resolved this problem by providing temporary or permanent facilities in their sports parks – I wonder why Aurora finds it so difficult to respond to a simple human requirement.

On 28th May 2008 I sent an email to Mr Tree reporting the problem. A portable toilet installed a week later – problem solved in seven days and the portable toilet remained in place for the rest of the baseball season. I had naively assumed that a portable toilet would have been installed the next year also – this was not to be so.

On 15th July 2008 staff recommended to Council $4,800 be provided to locate fifteen additional Portable toilets in town parks. Council approved the resolution. On 18th September 2008 at a meeting of LSAC the recommendation was considered but it was moved by Councillor Grainger and seconded by Judy Norwell that no portable toilets be placed anywhere in town parks. This was carried (LS08-032). Thus no toilets in 2009 – the problems continued.

I sent an email to you on 26th May 2010 and as a result Councillor Wilson has requested “staff prepare a report to place a minimum of one portable unit in each of the major playgrounds, sports fields etc. for the months of July and August.” According to your email below this will “allow Members of Council and /or LSAC members the opportunity to discuss the matter further, and also allow Staff , Sports associations, schools and residents an opportunity to offer their input and suggestions about the placement of portable washrooms in sports parks.”

I’m not experienced in the internal workings of municipalities but this appears to describe a quite lengthy “process”. I do hope that this can be resolved before the end of the baseball season as a month has elapsed already. If passed, will this be a permanent solution that will be in place next year from May to September (the baseball season) or do we go through the whole process anew each year?

Yours Sincerely,


Just when you think that LSAC couldn't possibly piss off anymore people they go and do something stupid like denying a staff report that recommends implementing portable toilets in parks.

That's right, in a meeting of LSAC on September 18th LSAC actually stopped the placement of portable toilets in town parks to be used as in previous years where demand has shown the clear need.

Here's the excerpt from their minutes:

LS08-032 – Portable Washrooms in Parks
Moved by Councillor Granger                                    
Seconded by Judy Norwell
THAT it be recommended to Council that portable washrooms not be placed in town parks by the Parks Department.

You can view the full minutes of this meeting here:

What kind of town is this?

What exactly gives a councilor, and LSAC the authority to deny toilets from town parks?

And why would they turn down a staff report?

To save $4800?

LSAC blows through money like no other committee, and now they're penny pinching on something as essential as a public toilet?

In consistent fashion the responses from councilors MacHeckron and the Mayor are flush with bureaucratic bullshit, there's lots of ramblings and finger pointing but no action plan, no assurances, no timetable for a solution and clearly no leadership.

Do we need to organize a “More Public Toilet” campaign by way of the World Toilet Organization ( ) to solve this issue?

All of this reminds me of a "piss-your-pants" funny scene in a Simpsons episode from Season 13 where Mr. Burns has an exchange with his assistant Mr. Smithers that could easily be an exchange between Phyllis & Evilina.

Mr. Burns: "I have to raise 60 million dollars or we're out of business"

Smithers: "Why is that, sir?"

Mr. Burns: "I told you I pissed it away"

With Mormac pissing Aurora's future away the town should consider changing its official slogan to "Urine Good Company"


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